rugby365.com's Invictus cast uncovered
The entertainment and rugby worlds are united this week – waiting with bated breath to see exactly what Clint Eastwood, Matt Damon and Morgan Freeman have in store for us with their new movie, Invictus.
South Africa, having only just emerged from Apartheid, hosted rugby’s biggest event, the World Cup, in 1995 – a monumental occasion for the country and one which, even if they didn’t know it at the time, would go a long way in helping to mend the pains of the past.
Political hero Nelson Mandela, president of South Africa at the time, turned to a group of predominantly white South African rugby players – led by Francois Pienaar – and asked them to win a World Cup for their people.
It was a task that few would have imagined was possible but it was one which ‘Madiba’ and Pienaar were determined to accomplish.
Of course, the big debate is over who should play what role in the film. Morgan Freeman was the obvious choice for Mandela. Having played ‘God’ in previous movies, the Oscar winner has proved his class in difficult roles.
What about the Springbok team though? Eastwood, the director of the soon-to-be Hollywood blockbuster, kept his international stars to a minimum but we fancy he could have amassed a truly world class line-up had he wanted…
Take a look at how rugby365.com would have cast the 1995 World Cup team…
15 André Joubert: The Rolls Royce of fullbacks, and who better to play him than one of the steamiest actors of all time, Roger Moore. They both have that refined look and good ol’ Jouba always seemed to have a James Bond-like trick up his sleeve whether it was spending time in a decompression chamber or playing a World Cup Final in a specially-created protective glove.
14 James Small: Who better to play the original wildman of South African rugby than Hollywood’s wildest, Irishman Colin Farrell? The beauty, here, of course, is that Farrell wouldn’t have to act much to be like Small and being Irish means he ought to know a thing or two about the game…
13 Japie Mulder: The powerful centre made a name for himself by putting the heat on the ‘impossible to stop’ Jonah Lomu… only one man could do this role justice… a man who does not sleeps, he waits… a man who can lead a horse to water AND make it drink… Chuck Norris.
12 Hennie le Roux: While he may be unpredictable at times the ‘Iron Man’, Robert Downey Jnr. could definitely have fitted the bill – delivering his shouts of ‘Come On Boys’ with timing and class.
11 Chester Williams: Denzel Washington, Cuba Gooding Junior and LL Cool J are all contenders but after seeing Washington get ripped for his moving portrayal of boxer Rubin Carter in ‘The Hurricane’ it just had to be him!
10 Joel Stransky: He might not really look like him but it’s Hollywood so that really doesn’t matter does it? Young superstar Zac Efron is an American Golden Boy – who better to fill the big boots of the Springbok No.10? Of course he’s also got plenty of dance experience so learning to slot over a drop goal shouldn’t be too difficult for him.
9 Joost van der Westhuizen: One of the greatest Springboks of all time, Joost has had the shine taken off his celebrity status recently following some pretty dramatic revelations about his personal like. In order to capture who he really is we need a world-class talent and someone who can relate to having some dirty laundry aired every now and then. Who better then to play Joost therefore than an icon like the Hoff, David Hasselhoff.
8 Mark Andrews: This was a tricky one… Homer J Simpson came into our thinking, but, frankly he is simply not athletic enough. In the end, we settled on football hardman and ever-improving actor Vinny Jones. If you don’t like it, argue with Vinny, he’s been signed and we’re not about to turn him away.
7 Ruben Kruger: Larry Hagman in his pomp (think Dallas in the 80s!) and Ruben Kruger in his prime could well have been brothers. Look at those jawlines…
6 Francois Pienaar: Matt Damon, according to reports, has done a pretty decent job becoming the Springbok captain but one wonders if Jason Bourne would have got the role if Scotsman (not Irishman) Gerard Butler wasn’t busy making a 100 movies already…
5 Hannes Strydom: Together with Mark Andrews and Kobus Wiese, the friendly pharmacist Strydom proved that white men can, in fact, jump. Yip, you guessed it, Woody Harrelson is the obvious man to fill this role.
4 Kobus Wiese: He might not be as tall as Kobus, but the resemblance is uncanny between ‘Koos’ and Bart Simpson. Take away the yellowness and squeaky voice and match up the hair – can you see it?
3 Balie Swart: While Bruce Willis would be able to offer the ‘Swart stare’ perfectly he lacks the bulk to pull it off in the front row. We’re taking a risk here but funny man Kevin James, star of the ‘King of Queens’, might just have it in him to pack down in the tight five.
2 Chris Rossouw: If James Dalton had made it into the final, then Verne Troyer (aka Mini Me) would finally have been able to move on from Austin Powers. That disappointment aside, we quickly found our man – none other than William Shatner, formerly TJ Hooker (geddit?), and presently Denny Crane.
1 Os du Randt: Not many people seem to watch the TV series, Lost, but with a serious haircut (although Os did have some hair in 1995) and a good shave, Jorge Garcia (aka ‘Hurley’) would make an excellent Os du Randt.
* Have we got it right? Did we miss anybody out? Should we have gone for Tom Selleck at fullback maybe? Let us know YOUR team!
* CHECK OUT IAFRICA.COM’s OFFICIAL ENTERTAINMENT REVIEW OF INVICTUS HERE ON RUGBY365 NEXT FRIDAY.
by rugby365
